Weekend update (Anxiety, Depression and A failure of gluten free hot cross buns)

If you’ve seen some of my updates over the weekend then you will know that I’ve had a bit of a rough weekend! I’ve felt quite depressed this weekend and wanted nothing more than to stay in my bed. Thankfully, most days I’m able to pull myself out of it and force myself to go out. My anxiety wasn’t too bad this weekend, however I was terribly anxious about having an anxiety attack. How ridiculous is that?!

Saturday was a huge failure. My partner eventually managed to get me out of the house at about 3pm. We popped to TkMaxx and had a quick walk around. The traffic was horrible and the weather was drizzly and so we decided to go straight home (via Tesco).

When I feel down I tend to bake and so I decided to tackle some gluten-free hot cross buns. It was a Paul Hollywood recipe, what could go wrong?

After hours of proving and rolling they eventually looked like this. I had high hopes at this point – they even looked vaguely like hot cross buns!

All I can say is do not ever attempt to make gluten free hot cross buns. The reviews on the recipe were negative but I thought perhaps people just hadn’t followed the recipe properly. After all, it’s a Paul Hollywood recipe and he’s the King of bread!

Scone-like-stones are what emerged from the oven. I broke a little off and the taste was just like a hot cross bun – the texture? Like eating clay. I cut one in half but couldn’t bring myself to eat it. It was a huge failure.

I consoled myself with cheesy quorn sausages and fried rice for dinner. It definitely took the edge off of the hot cross bun disappointment.


Sunday was slightly better. I needed some make-up wipes and so we used this as an excuse to pop to a local town. Usually I have a bad panic attack on the journey so we decided to take a different route which seemed to have a positive affect. We got there and I wasn’t too anxious which I felt for me was a huge achievement. We ran our errands and picked up what we needed. We were in an indoor shopping centre at this point and I thought it would be nice to visit one of the local parks and perhaps get some pretty pictures. We agreed to do this and headed back to the car. As we approached the doors to get out of the shopping centre we noticed that it was sleeting. As we ran across the road to the car park we got absolutely soaked – all hopes of walking round the park were ruined.

We decided to pop into our local garden centre instead just to get out for a little while longer. Whilst walking round I remembered that they did amazing gluten free cake in their restaurant. As some of you may know from reading my blog I find eating out incredibly difficult (impossible) at the moment. We got a slice of cake each to take home and treated ourselves to a cafetière coffee and gluten free chocolate cake. It was delicious.

My partner did some studying whilst I wrote a blog post. We (I) then decided we should do a quick yoga video. It wasn’t very relaxing as everytime we caught each other’s eye we were laughing. It was fun though.

It was a mixed weekend full of ups and downs. I’d like to forget how depressed I was feeling and just take away the fact that I had a positive experience with my anxiety.

What did you get up to this weekend?


3 thoughts on “Weekend update (Anxiety, Depression and A failure of gluten free hot cross buns)

  1. Hope you don’t mind me sharing some techniques for anxiety I was taught at CBT.
    Very strong mint chewing gum. When you feel it coming on pop it in. It can shock you back. I was dubious but it works. If you’re going somewhere you know makes you anxious look for blue things. Objects. It’s a distraction technique and blue is calming. I also carry a crystal in my pocket that I feel. It’s a self soothe technique. When you are quite deep into a panic look around for 1 thing you can see. 1 thing you can hear. 1 thing you can smell. 1 thing you can touch. 1 thing you can taste. Repeat until you start to calm. You may know some or all of these. There are others but those are the ones I like XX

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for sharing these tips! Really appreciate it and will try some of them out. I use the Bach Rescue Remedy and find that the strong taste of it shocks me back to reality ☺️ Didn’t know that about blue! Will have to keep my eyes peeled xxx


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